Manual Biography

by Kearney

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about

This album is called MANUAL BIOGRAPHY. It has twelve songs on it that I, Kearney, wrote, sang, et cetera. I wrote the songs over several months and then recorded them over several days. Occasionally on this album you will hear two voices at once. On other occasions, you will hear more than two voices at once, and sometimes those voices will sound different. You should not be alarmed by this. I, Kearney, am solely responsible for the vocals herein, on every single one of the album’s twelve songs. It is also true that, at first glance, MANUAL BIOGRAPHY may appear “personal.” Despite its first appearance, MANUAL BIOGRAPHY is deeply impersonal. It follows the life of a person whom I’ve never met, but after spending all this time in their head, I can only wish them the very best of luck.

credits

released October 13, 2015

Guitar, omnichord, vocals, production by Kearney

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all rights reserved

about

Kearney Vancouver, British Columbia

my name is evan, my band is Kearney, i am presently the sole member of the band but i am accepting online applications

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Track Name: Dear Diary
(That it's not that Tognotti's being an evil little manipulator... it's far worse than that)

You don't know a thing about me, do you?
I won't risk a first impression
The contents herein are underlined by someone
The signature is messy but it makes a deep depression

Turn through the pages
As fast as the notebook can handle
Is she smart for her age
Or is she an obtuse angle?

If you see any similarities
Don't hesitate to tell me why
This is just a first draft, I'm still working out the kinks
And by the time I'm done you will hardly recognize her

Make her pretend
That she wants you to know how she feels
And in the end
All of her pain I can steal
Track Name: Rulli
Mom works in a big house
Long stairs leading up
I can't climb them on my own
Who-o-o-o-o-oa

Dad stays at home a lot
He's a poet and he knows it
And I'm sure we've got a shot
Who-o-o-o-o-oa

Larkspur
Or whatever it's called
Seems like a pretty nice place
But do people live here?

There are all these big tall trees
And call me crazy
But I don't think I could live in a tree
For very long

I hop in his Saturn, like the car
Not like Venus
And we cross into the trees
Who-o-o-o-o-oa

And we meet at Rulli's
I get a pastry or two
And I smile for both of you
I get a bottle of the fizzy drink
That tastes like orange
Not like Sunkist
But the orange taste like adults would like
And I feel so free
There's no way to see through me
And I'm even smiling
When Mom finally leaves
I can't climb those stairs on my own
On my own
Track Name: We Rob Banks
Stories of your house burning down
And the man who wouldn't leave the kitchen even as your eyes would close
Who knows which way all these dirt roads
Twist and turn and go go go

Unincorporated town barking in the darkness
Helicopters carrying dead men to their graves
And there's no way to save a town built on this rock
We should be running scared but our shoelaces are locked

Make your move, darling
Feel the pressure throbbing deep within my skull
And never let the camera tell you how to act
Let's both burn together until Dogtown hears our pulse

Now let's get moving
Track Name: Problem Song (Nice Guy 3)
So no I didn't realize my new phone had a speaker
For playing music as loud as I want
My nightmare is that one of these days, I will make a simple mistake
And the sound in my headphones will radiate around the room

I got a lot of problems

Yes of course I'll work it out, can't be that hard to cut Shakespeare down
If I can't do it, then what am I good for?
So I take an hour or two, find the best way to impress you
Press the putty down a bit, and the image peels with it

I got a lot of problems

There might just be something wrong with me
But luckily, I will show you everything I can pretend to be

I got a lot of problems

The nice thing about lying to others and yourself
Is that eventually you can stop sweating the details
And you act so indignant every time they find
A single little piece of you poking out from behind

I got a lot of problems
But isn't it endearing?
Track Name: Cryptocurrency
I bought enough TV dinners
That I can get one free
I'll get more than that with the copy machine
At the library

Drinking O'Doul's every single night
That isn't a sin
I'm gonna buy a few thousand packs of Camels
And never breathe in

I found a loophole
I'm never gonna tell you how
I found a loophole

One of these days I'm gonna get high
And watch Last Year At Marienbad
In between the frame I will find the path
To the one true god

I will cash fake checks and store the money
In a safety deposit box
I will cross-reference all my contacts
And wait by the docks

I found a loophole
I'm never gonna tell you how
I found a loophole

I don't need any thanks
I am far, far too humble
I've got a plan to get us out of this jam
Five bucks a ticket to the robot rumble

Whenever the zombies decide to attack
I'll be outside with a shotgun
I have detailed city planning maps
All you'll have to do is run

I get kind of moody by twilight
No matter the place
And I know just how to fix it, he says
With a straight face

I found a loophole
I'm never gonna tell you why
I find these loopholes
Track Name: Dark Chocolate Orange
Colonial
Liquor store
Chewy gumdrops at the counter
Bell rings when you walk in the door

Foreign aisle
Fancy place
The boxes of cherries
Cream in the middle, syrup on my face

And brace for impact

Fridge is full
Empty treats
Every bite I get bigger
Tearing holes in the seats

Chocolate orange
Hard and cold
Slam it on the counter
Treat it like gold

And fold up the bounce house

When I'm done
Remembering
I buy another box
I eat so many it stings

Old habits
Never change
But I keep getting older
Isn't that strange?
Track Name: Yreka Blues
Wind nearly yanks me out of the car
I don't know if the wind is why
Our chains broke this far into our trip
But there's nowhere to bury the money so let's split

And you haven't faced true terror until you've seen the Mexican restaurant in Yreka

Tow truck driver, there within the hour
And his door is warped from the wind
God grant me the power to stay hopeful
Good thing this motel isn't all full, but it's awful

And you haven't faced true terror until you've seen the Mexican restaurant in Yreka

We were more than halfway to Portland
Thirty miles left until Oregon
I hear you don't have to pump your own gas there
But my final gasp will be of Yreka's air

One street to travel. cold as fuck
Halfway down the block
Imagine our luck as we stared
Right back at Lalo's glare

And you haven't faced true terror until you've seen the Mexican restaurant in Yreka, California
Track Name: Letter To Middle School
I hope upon hope that you're happy
And I'm sure that doesn't mean much to you
But when I think about those times, I get sappy
And I'm so damned glad you're doing what you wanted to do

If I saw you walking down the street
I probably wouldn't say hi
But don't mistake my reluctance for some lingering repugnance
I never knew what to say to you, and I never knew how to try

So I fly
Away

Maybe you don't think much of me
And frankly I don't think much of you
But whenever I do there's a slight sharp chill
That pierces my spine, up and through

An old Spanish mission with swallows nesting near
With painful precision it can suck out a tear
And the fear we keep that when we grow old
We'll have nothing left but the stories we've told

To each other
What a bother

My mind is a vacuum
And my heart is a sponge
And when your face pops up in one
They both take a plunge
I can try to face the fact
That my memory won't last
But I'm too busy digging
This hole in the past

The audience fills into their seats
The tickets sold out on the first day
And the movie I show is all scattered and jumbled
But I hear that art films have big cachet

My visuals are lacking but my sound is coming through
This song is for you and the version of you that you were
When we parted ways
And if I forget all you have to do is say

Who you are
Now that I'm gone
Track Name: Hedgehog's Dilemma
I have my clearly defined
Walls of protection
And they shrink every hour
I spend in this procession

They are herding us like cattle
They are grooming us to be
Every single goddamned thing
That doesn't work for me

So I fall
And I want you to fall with me
Surely this uprising will
Set me free

And I know you never meant
To hurt me
But the worst pain comes from people who are
Ready to desert me

The light shines through the window
On the pink walls inside
And it makes a sickly glow
Like I crawled in here and died

I'll slink out to a grassy place
My eyes fixed on a tiny mushroom
I'll be gone in fifteen If I say
I vomited in the bathroom

So I lie
And I want you to lie with me
Surely this escape
Will set me free

And I know you never meant
To hurt me
But the worst pain comes from people who are
Ready to desert me
Track Name: True Or False Memory
I'm sitting on your bed
The color of your bedsheets lost in a tomb
I'm looking out the window
Was there even a window in your room?

Or maybe I was in the kitchen
Or maybe the place where other people
Could keep switching the TV
On and off

I listen to you speak
Your hushed tones signaling a cliff
I read the words you throw at me
Every last glyph

Or maybe I couldn't hear you
Or maybe the way I tried to lie to myself
Couldn't make him
Stay

(Ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da...)

My finger is a Q-tip

I sit perfectly still, the pattern on the chairs
Green and loud
I know it was raining outside
But I can't remember a single cloud

Or maybe it was just a dream
Or maybe my eyes were wide open
But you still couldn't stop me from falling
Fast asleep
Track Name: Nunc Traho Ad Me De Amsterdam
Longest flight of my life
Longest elevator ride
New stuffy bed to keep me
Restless all night

Out the window I just stare
Raindrops tearing through the air
You explain how unfair it is
That I'd see her like this

Halfway out onto the dike
My feet tell me I shouldn't like
The travel
But dammit

The grey clouds approach
A burgeoning storm
And the hail rains down
And unlike before

You can see right through me

So you made a new life
So you took yourself out of the picture
And I don't really mind
But if you're gonna do that then don't say you're coming back

No one cares when you make him
Pick around his dishes
I'll refer you to the glossary
Cycles comma vicious

I break out one night
Take the bus through the dark
This hotel room is tiny
But at least it's a start

By the time we leave
I am bleeding on the inside
But I know it doesn't count unless
I'm bleeding on the outside

And I flash back to Larkspur
And I don't know what that means
And I don't think I should know
And I don't think I could live in a tree

For very long

So you made a new life
So you took yourself out of the picture
And I don't really mind
But if you're gonna do that

Yeah if you're gonna do that
Then don't pretend you're coming back
Track Name: Actualize (feat. Kearney)
A chemical reaction
The matter underneath my skin
Swarms its way to that shoulder
All the nerve endings flooding in

So when your head touches down
I feel the warmth and it makes me shout
This is all I have ever wanted
Then you take a deep breath, and then I black out

I know it's me and when I look down
The fear that I can't help still lurks
I do not recognize this body
And that's the only way this works

You ask me a question
I have all the answers
You let your heart beat next to mine
We are never still, we are dancers

I take a walk upstairs
See the other one sleeping in his bed
It's scary, silly things are scary
I'd rather be me, I'd rather be dead

I know it's me and when I look down
The fear that I can't help still lurks
I do not recognize this body
And that's the only way this works