by Kearney

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four songs about growing up

cw: child abuse


released October 13, 2016

words and music by kearney



all rights reserved


Kearney Vancouver, British Columbia

my name is evan, my band is Kearney, i am presently the sole member of the band but i am accepting online applications

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Track Name: Together Forever
you think you're pretty when you smile
you figure we could stay a while
no reason to rush our escape as the
A/C coughs and spits and breaks and we

dump the cashier's checks on the bed
this whole town thinks we're dead
and the smell that hangs around this room
it's not going anywhere any time soon

all good things come to an end
all broken things eventually mend
but you
and me

all the money in the world
can't save two frightened little girls
like you
and me

you run the shower real hot
i look around at what we've got
one big mess underneath the sheet
neither rain nor snow nor hail nor sleet and we

keep the faucet on just for the sound
keep the window open so we won't drown
our heads buried in each other's arms
one eye on the door, wait for the alarm

all good children know their place
all smart children protect their face
but you
and me

all the water leaking through
whatever will we do
with you
and me
Track Name: Pond Scum
i was born here
out in the marsh
woke up coughing and drowning
it was real harsh

but it taught me what i know
and it made me who i am
and now that i'm grown, i know that i'll be safe
several miles from land

so i wait for you in the deep
i spend every day asleep
trying to unwind
finding my mind

i see the villagers blinking lights
asking if i'm alright
i know i'm right

i am ugly
i have sinned
i am worthless
i don't know where to begin

there's comfort down here
it is warm
and you know how i love you
but you're standing in the middle of a goddamned storm

so i wait for you where it's safe
where it's too dark to see my face
and not a mirror in sight
and not a single ray of light

i hear the villagers calling my name
they all say i shouldn't be ashamed
you know they're probably lying
so would you please stop crying
Track Name: Muffle
dad says i'm a winner
i don't really see it but he swears that he can tell
and he loves me so much
that sometimes he can't help himself

look once in the doorway
then keep my eyes shut
hope that there's a camera
wait for the crew to call cut

one day i will grow up
big and strong
on that day i will be free
from everyone

last night mom was crying
i hope i didn't do anything wrong
and she loves me so much
she can't bring herself to sing along

look once in the mirror
don't like what i see
dad thinks i deserve this
i'm pretty sure that i agree

one day i will grow up
big and strong
one day i won't take this
from anyone
Track Name: Phenelzine
bad men on the balcony
came seething through the door
all the ones i'd left behind
sprawled out on the floor

i offered them some matchbooks
some coffee too
their eyes all stuck against the carpet
i didn't know what to do

so i went into the bathroom
and i flooded the place